What is your "Why"?

In 2016, I was in the third year of my undergraduate college and had started preparing for my GATE exam. With a year left for the exam, I joined a coaching centre to boost my preparation. During the initial months, my focus kept wavering- some days, I was on song, and then there were days when I felt like giving up. Soon it hit upon me that I was stuck in a positive feedback loop. A loop in which one thing led to another- fatigue after a tough day led to fear of failure, which further encouraged me to relinquish my preparation. The giving up attitude was so infectious that it started to creep into my other areas as well- except sleeping.

As an arch optimist, I always believed that my next source of awakening could come from anywhere- I should always keep my eyes open. Fortunately for me, I didn't have to wait for long. It was in one of the initial classes at the coaching centre when I had my eureka moment- a question that would become a turning point in my life.

"Why do you want to give GATE?", asked the teacher. It was a question for which I had no answer, nothing at all. I was a few months down with my preparation, but I literally had no clue why I wanted to give the exam. For the time being, I did craft one to save myself from embarrassment. But I knew that I was in big big trouble. The night and the following few days were dealt with earnest introspection. Yes, I finally had to give up my sleep.

For the most part of my life up till college, I had always gone with the flow. Be it anything, I just focused on the “how” part of my preparation- “why” was no way near. I did well most of the time, so I never bothered to question my approach. There were times when I got outcomes not as expected, even though I had put in a lot of effort. I had felt dejected and then moved on to the next immediate thing. I was going with the flow, remember.

But, college life was a different experience altogether. The day we step into college, we get an invaluable currency- Time. Time to explore our interests, build our skills, talk to people, and just think. It’s up to us how we invest our time. I remember using it to find the answer to my “Why”.

I talked to people, surfed the internet, and mostly spent time with myself in search of my answer. To spend time with oneself may sound funny, but the truth is we spend the least time getting to know ourselves better. Answers we usually look for outside, more often than not, can be found within us. My efforts reaped- I got my alluring answer to the question, "Why do I want to give GATE?". A powerful "why" made the whole process of preparation enjoyable- I didn't feel lost anymore. Although the fear did have its resurgence, it came during the final few days before the exam. But, by then, my heart had already reached my destination- it was easy for the rest of me to follow. When it was all over, I received more than I ever wanted- all because of a simple yet powerful "why".

I take this opportunity to share a few of my insights regarding “why” with you all. These insights can be straightforwardly applied, with the applications being endless- from preparing for an exam to living life.

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1. Why > How

“He who has a why to live for can bear with almost any how.” - Nietzsche's Aphorism

It is natural to first figure out the “how” part of attempting anything. There is nothing wrong with that. My proposition is before figuring out your optimum “how”, find your best “why”. It fits seamlessly in your preparation.

Anything you do, just ask yourself, “Why am I doing this?”. Search for your strongest “why” and then there is no looking back. Once “why” is clear, most often “how” also gets streamlined. Our mind subconsciously knows what’s right and what will get us to our destination.

The value that “why” adds to your preparation is immeasurable. But there’s a catch, your “why” should have depth- only then you’ll see its immense power.

2. Power of “Why”

"His why was greater than that punch, His why was greater than defeat." - Eric Thomas

What better than the story of Buster Douglas to talk about the manifold returns of a powerful “why”. On 11 February 1990, Douglas faced Mike Tyson, who was undefeated with 37 wins (33 knockouts), in a professional boxing match. Bell rang, and the fight began. Tyson dominated the fight from round one. Douglas was at the receiving end of the mighty punches of Mike Tyson. But not for long as Tyson was fighting not only against Douglas but also against his impregnable will. A will to win for his mother.

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

-If by Rudyard Kipling

Days up to his immortal fight against Tyson, Douglas went through the turmoil of losing his mother. Before she died, she had told the whole world that her son will defeat “The Great Mike Tyson”. During the fight, Douglas had two options like anyone of us- Give up or Stand tall!

"Sometimes it is the people no one can imagine anything of who do the things no one can imagine" - Alan Turing

Douglas did stand tall for his mother and himself- all because of a potent “why”. Mike Tyson got knocked out in the ring that night. Buster Douglas made history only because he could channelize his emotions well to craft out a Mike Tyson defeating "why".

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The road to success involves a few bumps and red lights. It is in the moments of despair where our "why" would come in handy. Our “why?” is the fuel that drives us- it recharges us to keep us going and sustain our path. Our "why" is the one-stop solution for our fatigue, fear of failure, and hopelessness. And if your why isn’t strong enough yet, maybe it is not the right time to pursue your path. There will be someone out there with a purpose who’ll out-perform you in your pursuit.

Go back to the drawing board- Find your “why”. There can be multiple answers- craft them into one. Come back with full force when you have your powerful “why”. And then you'll see- Nights will become days, tears will clear the vision; what you wanted tomorrow, it will be achieved today.